Comfort Zone

Well it only took three months for us to fall into a really comfortable place as Jax's family. Much like anything, it was all new and fun when he first joined our little crew, but as the newness wore off we all started to slack off.

Earlier on we would teach him new tricks, okay, I would. I would make sure he walked so he would learn how to behave on a leash and enjoy time outside of the house and confines of the backyard. I spoiled him with a new toy every time I was in the vicinity of Pet Smart, as did the kids. We practiced the new things he'd learned to keep him sharp. And we'd get down on the floor and play with him just about every time he looked like he could use a good tummy rub.

Now, don't get me wrong, we love - even adore - that Jaxie of ours. But we all have to be mindful to keep him learning and growing healthy and strong. I think part of why I fell off the Fur Mama wagon was because no one else, besides Jay, seemed to be on the Team Jax wagon and I got tired of being the only person taking care of our fur baby! But I know that Jax won't learn new tricks or commands, or respond the way we hope he will to old ones if we don't work with him regularly. When he goes out on a walk with Nas or Babe, Jax will just stop and lay down every so often. Need I mention that neither of the guys in our house have the patience for this? So if Jax lays down they don't encourage him to get up and keep it moving, they just bring him home and say Jax didn't want to walk with them.

It's time to get Jax into puppy classes. That is where we can all learn to work with him so we can nurture the little guy's mind because Jax is one smart dog. I would rather we help him use his wisdom for good and not naughtiness the way he often does now. We'll all have to tools needed to have the smartest dog we can, and that makes having a fur baby all the more enjoyable.

Meanwhile, we really need to be better about playing with him outside - not just sending him out to do his thing - and I've been more mindful of spending time with him on the floor the way I did before the newness started to wear off. Hopefully we'll strike a good balance and Jax will be a happy little guy for many years to come.

Our little fur ball

If we could use dog hair for weaves and wigs I do believe a Zuchon, Shichon, Bichon-Shih Tzu mix...JAX would be there to donate or sell his hair.  I don't think was not aware that dogs hair could GROW at the rate this puppy's hair does.  Thankfully it does not shed.  I grew up with dogs that shed all over the house, the furniture, the floors, my clothes...I'm not built for managing such a task as hair all over my house.  But I am also, I have found, not built for maintaining Jax's flowing locks at the rate the groomers charge!!

Jax came home in December, we had him groomed because he just smelled like dogs - I know dogs smell like dogs, but it was like he needed a fresh start. Plus, he smelled like not just Jax, but probably all that was in the pet store kennel with him. Come January we could hardly see Jax's eyes and his "potty path" was like an overgrown forest so poop would get stuck in his fur. Non-negotiable. I'm a clean kinda girl, as in, I don't want to see random nasties on my kids or my puppy! So he went in again for a full grooming, not just the puppy package, and he was a fluffy, fresh, nasties-free puppy again.  Two weeks later we couldn't see his eyes or his friggin' "potty path" either! WHAT!?!? So that was $45 for early January and $20 for mid-January.

Time out.

I decided when I picked up our fresh and fluffy Jax that THIS was NOT gonna work! So I looked into pet grooming tools I could get at home and at what price. How hard could it be to keep the hair out of his eyes and the poop flowing freely on the right path?! And for $20 to $40 I could do that whenever it was needed! SCORE! Heck, my daughter Jay nor I get our hair done for $25 a month, let alone $65!!! Be real! I knew for a fact that our puppy surely wasn't taking that kind of money out of the house!

So the little clipper set I found at Walmart has worked out beautifully! I have yet to master the back end trimming - Jax understandably would rather I didn't take a buzzing tool to his butt! And I feel the same way...I'd rather not have to do it! Plus he flaps his tail down over it when I'm back there, understandably, and I don't want to hurt him. So many times I'm sure it could use a good trim, but if he's clean after a potty session, I'm happy! Being nervous when trimming his face had to cease pretty quickly or I will surely hurt him. That's when I have to be in charge, have someone help hold him still and I get after it. Done and done, and it doesn't cost us $20 for the little clean up!

The next task will be learning to bathe our Jax. For some reason that really makes me anxious. Not for some reason, for these reasons: What if we don't get him good and clean, what if we leave product on his skin making him itchy, how on earth will we dry him? When he goes outside to play in the snow, or just potty for that matter, he comes in with balls of snow firmly frozen into his fur. That alone takes a good 10 minutes with the regular blow dryer to dry! What will a full-on wet puppy dog require?!?!? We may have to splurge on baths til winter's end...at least in the summer he can air dry outside...right? Man, I have a lot to learn.

Watching him grow

It seems our little "Jaxie" is growing up.  When he first came home I could play rough with him and I didn't really have to engage any arm muscles.  When he first came home it was easy to carry him up and down the stairs in one arm to get him outside to do his morning business, or up to his kennel at bedtime. This was necessary because he was terrified, and probably too small anyway, to get up and down the stairs on his own. Up until a month or so ago, in fact, it was easy for Nas to carry him with both arms! But those days are behind us.

Jax is 5 months old and he weighs 13 pounds and he seems to grow in length on a weekly basis. And I thought my babies grew up fast. Well yesterday I felt melancholy about our puppy growing up, because it's not enough to see my daughter eye-to-eye or realize that I can fit my son's shoes (and I don't have tiny feet!). To have yet another baby grow up in the house seems unreal especially because he's only been here a couple of months!

First I whine about the challenges of teething and potty training, now that we're past that I'm sad because he's growing up. You gotta love motherhood. But I must say, I'm a fan of older kids - even when it comes to puppies, I've learned. Growing up I was pretty independent fairly early on, so I'm not used to anyone being too needy for too long. I found the baby days with the kids to be extremely hard work because, well, they needed me all of the time! The same goes for Jax. When he first came home I felt like I needed to be close by virtually all of the time, so I was. Getting him potty trained required someone be home with their eyeballs on him virtually all of the time, that was my job. And once the kids became more independent, our daughter coming around much sooner than did our son, I felt like the hard work paid off and I could finally enjoy more of the fun that is being a Mom.

In the same way I'm enjoying playing more with Jax, letting him just hang out with us and not have to watch his every move for "signs" he has to go potty, and the kids are enjoying him more because he's not trying to teethe on them at every turn. It is probably also easier for me to let them play with him more because he's not so teeny tiny - 6 pounds isn't a lot to work with...13 pounds? We can have a great time at that weight!

Although I see his pictures from a mere few weeks ago and remember the challenges Jax presented and really just how absolutely adorable that teddy bear puppy was as a little bitty guy, I know we have a long life ahead with our Jax and I just need to enjoy this moment in time. Soon enough I'll miss THESE days!

Puppy Love

Jax has been our fur baby for about a month and a half and we have all fallen in love with him. When I would hear people talk about how much they loved their dog I would think, Well, it's just a dog. I didn't get it. But now that I am a fur Mama I realize that the excitement a dog shows those he knows and loves when they walk into the house or just into the room is second to none. My kids love me, but they don't run and greet me the way Jax does. That little dog knows how to greet a girl! Not only is there a bond between our family and the new addition, but caring for and even providing for a dog is very fulfilling for me. It seems nurturing is hard wired into my DNA especially when it comes to those I love.

Which is where the 'problem' stems from, I think. The hubby fell first for Jax, and he fell hard. So hard that I found it impossible to tell him anything but to go get the puppy and bring him home. I assumed Jax and his Daddy would be inseparable because of that instant connection. Well, it seems that when you are primary caregiver for a dog you get a lot of love and said dog wants to be around you, or at least know you're near. Primary caregiver in this house would be written under my name if I had a business card. Not that I don't want Jax to love me, but I really want him to adore his Daddy too because I know his Daddy adores him.

The other day I left hubby with Jax to go to the store. He told me, when I returned, that Jax whined and looked around for me while I was gone. That made me sad. Again, I love Jax and want him to love me, but somehow I need to help Daddy and fur baby create that bond for themselves. I have made this my mission.

I wasn't sure where I would start, but knowing that a baby of any kind is keenly aware of who provides for him: feedings, answering his cries, cleaning him, taking time to get to know him. This is where the bond for me with Jax begins - and probably ends. I do play with him and make sure he gets out on walks, but I do far more nurturing than playing. This is where his Daddy needs to step in. I'm going to make a list of things Daddy needs to do for a few days, at least, to make sure Jax knows that Daddy is there for him too. Daddy can't just play with the puppy and expect the same kind of placement in the "pack" as Mommy - based solely on the things I do for Jax. In my mind, Jax probably sees Daddy as one of the kids - based solely on the fact that he primarily plays with Jax. So I'm going to help these two get a more stable relationship - at least where Jax knows and adores his Dad. I sure hope it works!

Potty Trained? CHECK!

Our little Jax is growing up! He was four months old as of the tenth, he has gained about three pounds since we first brought him home, and he's made his place in our family in such a way that it seems he has always been here. I so love that puppy of ours.

My first goal when we brought Jax home was to help him feel comfortable with us. That went over really well. And like any other puppy parent, I'm sure, the next goal was to get this puppy doing his business outside. I had heard that it would take a few days to a few months. The guy at the pet store had two puppies, worked full-time, and he said his puppies were potty trained in a month. I figured if he could do it with all of that going on, surely I could knock this out in a couple of weeks! Right? Well, wrong.

Because I'm home all day I knew it was my job to get this puppy potty trained.  So I read everything I could online about how to conquer the challenge before me.  The suggestions I went with included:
- take your puppy outside after every nap and play time, after every feeding and in the morning when he wakes
- reward your puppy when he pees and when he poops with celebration and treats, every time

I figured I could handle that. I did just that, but still didn't feel like I was succeeding. So I went back to the internet in hopes I would find more info. Cesar Millan, "Dog Whisperer", has a great website, his suggestions were very helpful:
- watch your puppy, keep an eye on him at all times, and you will start to recognize the signs of his needing to go out to do his business
- minimize his space, your puppy does not need to have access to every room in your house, this tip will help you keep him in your sight at all times

Wow, who knew? I proceeded to block off the doorways leading to the living room - also the place where he seemed to want to go potty the most! Oddly, it's where my Dad's dog and a friend's dog went potty as well when we dog sat them. Go figure. Now, I would be downstairs where I could see him whether I was surfing the 'net, watching television, washing dishes or making dinner, I could always see Jax. This tip right here was HUGE. Doing this one thing, minimizing his space, helped me learn that Jax will get a little hyper when he needs to go poop. He will whip around in a circle and pick up the pace around the family room. When he has to go pee he gets real 'sniffy'. This sign gets tricky because Jax likes to eat ANYTHING he can find on the floor, which requires sniffing. But it has proven to work just to put him out if he gets 'sniffy'.

In week three I failed my Jax. I wasn't watching him as closely as I should have been and we had so many accidents that it seemed he was covering every square inch of carpet with his excrement. This made me very, very upset...with MYSELF. We had been working on this for three weeks, after all. Maybe what I was doing wasn't working! But in reality, just when it seems you can't do it anymore, there is a break through. This was the case in potty training Jax.

In week four, right around his four month 'birthday' something clicked - for both of us! Jax would go to the patio door and wait for someone to open it. He would bounce out onto the deck, go do his business, then come back to the patio door and wait for us to retrieve him. After he did this a few times one day I started to think maybe, just maybe our puppy 'got' it. I didn't say anything (I guess I didn't want to jinx it), just did the same thing over a few more days and got the same, accident free result! Our puppy is potty trained!!!

Now, the funny thing is that Jax could have easily been at this point two weeks in, give or take a few days, had it not been for human error.  But because I didn't know all of the ins and outs it took us a full month to reach this point.  I'm not complaining though! Better late than never!

This.Is.Exhausting.

In two days we'll have been the proud new family blessed to love and raise our puppy Jax for exactly one month. ONE MONTH. Can that even be possible? In the past two days I have found myself utterly exhausted by the demands of being a fur Mommy, and the calendar says I'm all of ONE MONTH in. That can't be right.

So, because I've never done this puppy parenting thing, I liken Jax's "exhausting" behavior to toddlers having good days and bad days. I figure, maybe we're just having a couple of off days when he just.won't.listen. Or maybe he's tired? You know, toddlers behave terribly when they are tired - or have those tiring growth spurt days - heck, I behave terribly when I'm tired.

Well today has been exhausting with my little fur baby, Jax, and when I was just spent I put him in his crate and I took to my bed and an US Weekly Magazine. While I flipped through the pages chronicling celebrity divorces, babies, marriages, and fashion hits and misses, I thought, "Maybe I just have to keep him busy and he'll be better." So I hopped off my bed and grabbed my gym shoes and Jax's leash. A walk would do us both some good.

When I went to get Jax he got really excited to see the leash. I was hopeful we would get further this time than we did the last - he's doing really well over time in fact! - and we were off. We went a good four blocks without Jax stopping at every little sound and he even peed at the park - not on my carpet. "Yes, this is what we needed!" Then we got home.

Jax proceeded to eat random things off the carpet then run from me because he KNEW he wasn't supposed to be eating a cut-out picture from a magazine. He dug at the deck to pull tiny rocks out and eat them. Again, he didn't want to give up the rocks so I had to dig them out of his mouth. This.Is.Exhausting. So I left Jax with the rest of the family so I could get dinner started.  Jax started running around the house at a mile a minute then my son discovered a pile of poop. Inside the house. On my carpet. I took a deep breath and finished seasoning the meat. Someone else would be handling that crap. Now, Jax is in his crate, probably asleep on his back with his floppy ears splayed out. I on the other hand, could go for a nap but the day does not end just because Jax has exhausted me. No, no. All I can do is pray we have a good night and a better day tomorrow because this fur Mama is tired.

Leader of the Pack

It seems that whenever I read anything about puppies, "showing your puppy that you are the pack leader" is mentioned at one point or another. Cesar Millan is big on the idea that being firm and unwavering will help establish 'who's boss' between a puppy and his person.  For me, I think this concept comes easily for me because I'm the kind of Mom who wants her children to flourish, but they are not going to, well, lead me. I'm in charge, I'm the boss, I make decisions that are based on their well-being, and unless I ask for their input I'd really rather not hear it from them. Hm, that sounds a bit more strict than I really am. After all, my kids get in trouble often enough for talking back, so clearly I have allowed them to think I want to hear their thoughts on any given matter. That's for another blog. We're talking puppies here.

So once we were reminded that the hubby and I have to let Jax know that we are in charge of him, it seemed Jax decided to go all rebellious puppy on us! If we told him no, Jax would growl at us, run away if he had something we didn't want him to have (like I want to chase a dog down), and sometimes he would bark at us as if to say, "Hey, I have some thoughts on what you're telling me to do!" Is it just animal nature to want to be in charge of ourselves? Jax sure does seem to want to regulate his own life, until it comes to being fed and having his every need provided. Hm, sounds like the babies I birthed!

I had to come down hard on Jax the other day, coincidentally the same morning the kids decided to test me, and although I felt bad some time later, it has really paid off. Now when I tell Jax no, he drops whatever he has in his mouth (rocks, hair bands, today a popped balloon) usually immediately. I don't have to feel like "I'm the leader of the pack" but I most definitely expect the smallest, currently neediest, of my children to at the very least LISTEN to me when I tell him what to do. Heck, I play with Jax, I make sure Jax is safe, brush Jax, buy Jax new toys and treats, walk with a very distracted and slow Jax, feed Jax bright and early, and I absolutely love that little furry guy we call Jax. So really? The least that child of ours could do is listen and, even if it's only most of the time much like the kids I birthed, obey.